Butterfly Beauties – Caterpillar Crankies

Contributing post by Kenzie Brown

“Today if you are using drugs know that those choices are not who you are. The guilt you feel is from within yourself because you know the real you. You know how capable you are in life. If you are using it’s okay. But don’t beat yourself up for those choices. There is always tomorrow to start new, and beautiful things don’t happen overnight. A butterfly isn’t always a butterfly. And some die along their journey, that doesn’t stop the other caterpillars from going for the goal of a butterfly. Sometimes to achieve the beauty and light we are capable of we have to go through the muck and grime and darkness. The darkness doesn’t mean you are done growing. Some of the most beautiful things in nature come from the darkness. Remember that today if you feel like a failure, the the darkness is pressing down around you. You are in your cocoon and eventually you will emerge from the darkness a beautiful butterfly. Enjoy the chaos, embrace it, scream to the darkness you are being held down by, feel that pain. Let it burn your mind and dissolve your flesh, so you can reach your ultimate beauty.”🖤🖤🖤-Kenzie Brown

Sometimes the caterpillar brain isn’t ready to hear about the future.

It feels safe in the here-and-now. EVEN IF – it’s dangling off of a branch. EVEN IF a tornado is coming.

It thinks it’s safe. Nothing can harm it. Nothing is required in outgoing effort.

It can JUST BE itself among the other labile caterpillars.

Sure it crawled into the cocoon on it’s own free will, but it didn’t really think about getting out.

The thought of soaring gracefully free and strong among the flowers is not in it’s field of vision.

It doesn’t matter how many perfumed flowers you wave under it’s spiracles. You can flash neon billboards throughout the night. It won’t see or smell what you want to to.

What it wants is acceptance.

Acceptance of its current state of affairs.

Something like: “Hey Mr. Wormy worm. I know you feel safe in there because you don’t have to deal with life’s barrage of feelings and emotions. You can do what you want & it seems like you’re not bothering anyone. I get that. When you are ready to come out, I’m here for you.”

Notice the non-shaming. Not trying to tell them how many people are affected by their decisions. ( their worm brain can’t comprehend that right now- it’s in survive mode) not trying to change their thinking.( How has that worked for YOU – when someone tries to change your mind? Aka opinion.)

It’s hard enough to figure out why other people think the way they do & have the opinions that they do. Yet we continually TRY to convince a hijacked brain of the damage they are causing and of the ‘obvious’ solution. I am continually reminded that everyone deserves the dignity of believing what they do -EVEN when it’s hurting others…why? Because you can’t MAKE them change anyway.. You may can physically restrain them with a variety of ‘tools’. In nursing we call it a chemical restraint if we’re using medicine. So why do even us nurses forget that addicts are under a chemical restraint mist all the time?

All we can really offer is HOPE that there is a way out……

They just need a little bit of HOPE.

My heartfelt prayers to those who have lost their butterflies and caterpillars along the way.💔🦋🐛💔

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A unique perspective on the world from a small town girl turned big city nurse. Now a grandmother to 6 gregarious, resplendent boys and 5 endearing, magical girls, she strives the make the world a more understanding, pleasant place to experience this intense thing called life.

3 thoughts on “Butterfly Beauties – Caterpillar Crankies”

  1. Beautiful, honest, real, relatable. Loving self is accepting first the self with its everything , good & bad. We are what we are , we do what we do because of people around us, even those who we gave our hearts. We never have to justify anymore why we are trying to save ourselves. Our lives and happiness matters. 🙏♥️

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