The Path Forward

I must love the analogy of a road.

Stretching out in the horizon. The path beyond seeing. The unknown just waiting for me to arrive to its party. Characters awaiting backstage to act out their best performance.

Then hiding behind the curtain to see my reaction. Everyone wants a show. The sparkly draw of drama, anger in its raw-est form. The ego on full display. Pain with lots of tears. The journalists love a pained heart. To bring out emotion from a torn soul makes for a great story that leaves people angry and quickly searching for who’s to blame. Then there’s the empty souls who are jealous of what passion is evoked out of this pain. How could someone care so much about anything? They shake their head in bewilderment, as they go back to their monotone life, not realizing that their bewilderment is their passion. They are playing out their part perfectly. The neutral, apathetic but always in control stagehand.

Everywhere I go I take a picture of roads.

It must mean I’m leaving all the stress and worry of the past behind.

It must mean that I have hope.

Hope in humanity. Hope in Love. Hope that someday I’ll get to a place where my hurt heart is settled on a comfy soft pillow and resting in bliss that today it will be alright. Today there won’t be any “what- ifs” or “what was’s”. That today I won’t ruminate on the past. Of loss, lost memories, people, places that tear at heartstrings.

Rarely have I taken a picture in my rear-view mirror. So why does my brain live there? 

Why do I insist on dwelling on what I don’t have? As a mom of little toddlers, if I gave them a treat or a toy and they threw it on the ground in a fit of whiney anger, did I keep giving them more to to try to appease them?

Maybe.

Once or twice. But soon I realized that they would never be happy with anything until I fixed the real problem.

Are you hungry? Sad? Tired?

Until WE fix what is bothering us right now, we can never be at peace.

“But!” you plead, “it’s not ME! If only xyz would do xyz THEN I could be happy.” Logically we know we can’t control another. Logically we know we are being puppets to their story. We are acting out as the victim, then the villain, then the hero. We want to be the star of our own story. We want to wrap up the ending with “and they lived happily ever after”.

God how we want that!!! Our heart soars at the possibility of that happening. The human Spirit in action. The human spirit of survival. It’s what kept little babies alive when supposedly they were born and mom couldn’t take care of them they could follow the Linea nigra: a dark line stretching from the top of the pubic hair to the belly button, sometimes extending to the breast, so babies could find the milk filled nipples.

Holly Clark/Stocksy

Might be an old wives tail but maybe the road in all my pictures represent a linea nigra. My lifeline to HOPE.

I once asked an elderly housekeeper in the hospital where I worked what it was that got her up everyday. She had loads of energy and never complained. She told me, “It’s the curiosity of what each new day bring”. Wow. How can I be that willing? That curious? How can I forge- forward without fear?

Right now I’m at the crest of the hill. The very farthest point you can see in the picture. I’m hopeful. Nervous curious. Wanting. Craving peace. That peace is different for everyone. It might be a problem solved. A Love resolved. A bill paid off. Or it might be coming to terms with what is.

Here’s my collection of What if’s. My roads to hope. Followed by Jack Canfield’s advice to keep being present as life unfolds.

JACK CANFIELD

Think of a car driving through the night. The headlights only
go a hundred to two hundred feet forward, and you can make
it all the way from California to New York driving through
the dark, because all you have to see is the next two hundred
feet. And that's how life tends to unfold before us. If we just
trust that the next two hundred feet will unfold after that,
and the next two hundred feet will unfold after that, your
life will keep unfolding. And it will eventually get you to
the destination of whatever it is you truly want, because you
want it.

Defining Enabling for Ourselves

I usually avoid using the word ‘Enabling‘ because of the broad definition of it’s meaning and because of the negative connotations. I still believe that no one else can “decide” for someone else what enabling is. Each situation is so unique that I believe it’s a disservice to assess a situation based on one paragraph in a support group.

Of course we all learn as we go. There is really no other way to navigate through this maze of addiction or any other debilitating situation that renders the person unable to manage their life. To leave them floundering in their chaos just doesn’t seem right to me. Although I don’t support my son while in active addiction, I will support any and all things recovery.

I like this article from Nova Recovery with whom I have no affiliation with- because it lays out most of the facts surrounding helping with addiction. There are always unique situations and no one knows your particular one. I do have trouble with “Don’t act out of fear” because of the increased risk of death or long term prison sentences.

I also don’t like the last paragraph lol.

Tell me what you think.

The Enabling Cycle: When Helping isn’t Helping

Nova Recovery Center | Posted on June 1, 2016

Drug addiction does not discriminate, it doesn’t care if your rich or poor, famous or unknown, a man or woman, it doesn’t care what race or age you are. Many people can relate first hand to the effects of the drug epidemic in America, and parents are crying out with pleas of help. Everyone connected to the person abusing drugs can and will get hurt, husbands, wives, boyfriends and girlfriends, babies, other family members and friends.

Drug addiction doesn’t only hurt the user, but everyone else connected to him or her also. Substance abuse and addiction is a very serious problem for many people. The 2012 National Survey on Drug Use and Health found that, in the year before the survey, more than 23 million people needed treatment for substance abuse. However, only 2.5 million received drug treatment. Even more staggering 21.5 million of them reported that they saw no need to seek help. This figure suggests that many people are in denial about the severity of their substance abuse.

The reason behind this denial are complex, but one common reason is enabling. This means that someone close to the user is accepting their substance abuse and allowing it to continue with relatively few consequences. Enabling can be extremely dangerous, both for drug user and their loved ones. Since enabling discourages users from addressing their problem with professional help, it can lead to situations that cause physical, mental and psychological harm.

dssaaaa

Enabling protects them from the consequences of their choices and actions. The more you let them depend on you and take you for granted, the less motivated they are to change. Most enablers start off doing a nice thing for the drug user, usually something to help them out. They always have the best intentions and fully believe they’re helping, but they fail to realize that drug users are selfish and use manipulation to get what they want. The enabler enables because it gives them a false sense of self and makes them feel needed. They also feel control over the other person (through guilt) by helping them. However, they ironically still end up feeling resentful, frustrated, or unappreciated. Thus starting the cycle of enabling which can be extremely difficult to break. In my recent years of working in the addiction field, I’ve come to understand deeply the effects of enabling on the user and the enabler. Here is an example chart of the cycle of enabling.

Other examples of enabling are:

  • Ignoring the addict’s negative or potentially dangerous behavior – This behavior can involve anything from overlooking problems to denying that a problem even exists
  • Difficulty expressing emotions – Enablers are often unsure how to express their feelings, especially if there are negative repercussions for doing so
  • Prioritizing the addict’s needs before her own – While it is natural to want to help loved ones, enabling takes helping a step too far, where the addict has her needs taken care of while the enabler neglects her own
  • Acting out of fear – Since addiction can cause frightening events, the enabler will do whatever it takes to avoid such situations
  • Lying to others to cover the addict’s behavior – An enabler will lie to keep the peace and to present a controlled, calm exterior
  • Blaming people or situations other than the addict – To protect the addict from the consequences of drug abuse, the enabler might accuse other people of causing drug abuse
  • Resenting the addict – The result of the above behaviors is that the enabler will likely feel angry and hurt. She may act on these feelings by resenting the addict all while continuing to enable the addiction.

Breaking The Cycle of Enabling.

While enabling can be a serious problem for everyone involved with addiction, it is completely possible to break the enabling cycle so the addict can heal in productive, meaningful ways. Here are some suggestions to help someone stop enabling:

  • Don’t lie for anyone. Don’t be the parent or wife who gets on the phone and says her husband or son is sick when he’s hungover or using.
  • Don’t make excuses for others when they don’t fulfill their obligations.
  • Don’t clean up after a substance abuser. They should see the damage they’ve done and the chaos they’ve caused.
  • Be accountable for your bills only. If you’re not responsible for it, don’t pay it. Especially when dealing with consequences that addicts create. Don’t bail them out of jail, unless they want drug treatment help.
  • Stand up for yourself. You don’t have to be mean, but you do have to put your foot down. Setting and creating healthily boundaries allows you to gain your own life back.
  • Don’t rescue. A person must suffer the consequences of their actions. Which means don’t pay for lawyers or post bail. Many enablers turn from helping to saving and recusing quickly. Soon all of their thoughts and actions surround only the user, and they’re missing out on their own life.
  • Stop trying to fix everybody. You’re not a magician and you’re not God. Work on yourself. Get the support of friends, family members and counselors. Join Al-Anon or some other 12-step program. Do whatever it takes to stop yourself from hurting somebody else with your notion of helping.

Real love for somebody is being able to step back and allow them to suffer enough to recognize their need to change.

Who’s To Blame?

Repost from February 2021

Ahh who’s to blame for the opioid epidemic? Notwithstanding personal responsibility, of course, but It’s easy to blame the Sacklers and the physicians for pushing it all those years ago. All for-profit as they seem to have zero remorse. But some people, prefer to blame “the enabler” for another’s addiction.

According to some current trends, us mom’s fit that label.

This tears my heart out because most of (or some of) my addiction uneducated (& unhealed) family, pretty much blame me for our addicted loved one for not choosing recovery. It’s a ridiculous unnecessary concept that I would be responsible for my son’s behavior.

It’s as if a very thick line has to be drawn for team X and team Y.
These people are all as deeply traumatized as I am about my son’s fall into addiction.
He was the family hero, leader & (I assume) they all just think it’s a matter of willpower on his part and his willpower would be higher if I didn’t do x & z ?

In reality, I hardly do anything for him, but they haven’t taken the time to actually talk to me about it. He’s the never mentioned elephant in the room who’s hasn’t been in the room for going on 2 years……
They have all shunned him & refuse to even talk to him- mostly because, yes, once every few months he does ask for money, or he will ask my sons for a business tool, etc… Which is denied.
So, as you can see, there’s a lot of burned
Bridges, hurt feelings, betrayal, abandonment… Everything that goes along with addiction.
And somehow, Moms are supposed to fix all that?

"If mom would just quit helping him", he would shape up.

Bottom line. My son is very very ill. He’s so incredibly stubborn and very ADD- which makes it all the worse. He’s still very ill.
He is also still my hero because even as an addict he has treated me better than most of my family.
This is why I’m so sensitive to all the enabling posts seen on support groups. My son is still a human, a struggling one. He has lost over 100 lbs. He still has nothing to his name. No car, no tools, yet still will go and pour a little driveway with great pride. (He used to run 3 businesses)
I love Resurrektion of Me on IG because her posts on people deserving of basic needs despite them doing things we don’t agree with-hits home to me right now.

If tough love worked, my son should be better by now. If caring and emotionally supporting him is a reason to stay in addiction then I guess I am the cause.

Bless us all🥰

Fighting Against Someone’s Free Agency

Way back in the 4th grade at Lincoln Elementary in small town America, some 40+ years ago; I remember seeing the anti smoking video of someone with a hole in their throat who didn’t let that stop them from smoking.

It horrified me so much I ran home in tears begging my Mom to PLEASE STOP SMOKING.

“Do It For Me! Please, Mom. Can’t you see I need you? Can’t you see I’m scared you will leave me then who will take care of me? Because if you leave me I will have a lifetime of fear of loss and will spend immense amounts of energy to avoid loss”

– the inner child of Samantha Waters.

I didn’t actually say all that. But now I know that my fear of losing people begin with that moment, only to be followed by the lesson that it’s not just losing people I have to fear. I had countless pet dogs run over by cars on the busy main street we lived on. Oh, how I mourned each of their deaths. It didn’t matter how much I vowed to keep them tied up, or behind a gate- NEVER in the house!; they always seemed to get out & became infatuated with chasing those moving black tires. As I sat beside each dying dog, with tears streaming down my freckled little girl face; I vowed to do better next time. To love harder. To be more responsible.

To control the actions of another so that I can feel better.

I really thought I could control the universe or at least those around me. Not in a domineering narcissistic way. I’m as far from that personality as can be. (Some might disagree) but my intent is the same, I suppose: to help ME feel better.

You see, when faced with these losses, every single time throughout my young life, I didn’t know how I was ever going to get through it. I felt incompetent to handle it, to forge through those uncomfortable emotions. Losing my brother, my hero, my protector, when I was 14 was my biggest devastation. It shook my whole confusing world even more and left me feeling more alone than ever. I would avoid working through those emotions for a period of 10 years at least. I accomplished this denial by not talking about it and using other behaviors of co-dependence and “clinginess” to specific people and things to give me that sense of feeling relevant and in control. Relevant enough to make things and people want to stay……

Of course that doesn’t work, which creates a wounded soul with somewhat of a inferior ego and victim mentality. I’m not going to go into the psychology of these terms, but to me it just means that the world is harsh.

After watching Netflix’s: Sensitive, the untold story, I realized that my sensitivity to the harshness of the world was a unique minority but certainly not rare. I would like to say that the losses and tragedies in my life have made me stronger, but I’m not so sure because I still feel incompetent to handle traumas as they come up.

Of course we all have thoughts of “if only”. I do know enough that those thought are NOT helpful and keep us stuck in the past. Recently I’ve been seeing a lot of “time is not linear” thoughts. This helps me feel better because it relieves the pressure of:

“I should know better”.

If our experiences fail to teach us how to react and feel “the correct feelings” then what excuse do we have? What if it’s just a matter of clumping certain experiences together as a journey themselves, not in a particular timeline? I like that.

I’m not talking about defense mechanisms. Our experiences drive those. I’m referring to the positive coping skills and healthy thoughts that “should” happen with each new drama and trauma we have.

My mom never did quit smoking until her diagnosis of lung cancer in her early 70’s. She was very lucky to have that long of an earthly life with the tobacco habits she maintained. And I was blessed to have her in my life and my children’s life for that long. I took care of my Mom, emotionally and in a lot of physical ways my whole life, and it was an honor, not a chore. It helped make me who I am. Had she “changed” into the person I wanted her to be back then, I may not be the person I am today.

At the time of that little girl running home to beg my mom to quit smoking, was all I wanted in the entire world. When my brother died, all I wanted in the entire world was for that not to happen. When each of my kids did things against what I wanted for them, I pleaded and bartered with my God to change their minds. When people rejected me, I suffered in silent anger and bitterness. Luckily hindsight 20/20 is almost always forgiving with wisdom and clarity.

I now can forgive all those who didn’t ‘do as I wanted them to’, but mostly I forgive that little girl who was just struggling to survive, just like everyone else.

“The very person you find it hardest to forgive is the one you need to let go of the most. Forgiveness means letting go. It has nothing to do with condoning behavior; it’s just letting the whole thing go. We do not have to know how to forgive. All we need to do is be willing to forgive. The universe will take care of the hows.” – Louise Hay

Where does “free agency” and doing things for others’ benefit meet? Many battles have been fought for this idea. I mean, sure – a parent shouldn’t smoke for or around her kids, but there’s that dastardly word: Should”.

Lots of things shouldn’t happen, but they do.

It’s out of our control. We have heard in modern psychology for years to take care of ourselves first. To fill our cup. We instinctively know that people can’t be responsible for others’ happiness. It just never works. There are too many variables. The person who runs around trying to please each person they interact with is not called being polite, it’s called exhausting. In these moments of confusion when I don’t know which master to please, I turn to Matt Kahn’s wisdom of loving the girl in me who doesn’t know what to do. Loving the crying girl, the girl in mourning for her brother, for her parents now gone, and for the unraveling of her family due to the effects of substance use. It’s ok to not know the answers or the outcomes. It’s ok just to LOVE the one who wonders.

At this moment, the Universe wants you to know….
It’s not a matter of what happens, but how we choose to respond, that determines our level of consciousness. Whether able to act courageously in the face of despair, or continually shut down whenever change arrives, self-love is always the answer.
It may not lessen the pain or change your reality on command, but it will always give you everything you need to be the unwavering support, unlimited compassion, and irrefutable source of forgiveness absent from the past. From honoring the one who needs to know every detail about the future before stepping forward, to embracing the one who only knows doubt– and even acknowledging the one who yearns for love but has no idea how to feel worthy enough to receive it, every experience offers countless opportunities to deepen our relationship with our hearts as a gateway into the oneness of Source energy.
Rather than attempting to embrace the past,
what if you took the time to honor the
one it happened to?
Instead of trying to passively accept the injustices of life, why not passionately acknowledge the authenticity within you that cannot be okay when anyone is denied, persecuted, harmed, alienated, shamed, or judged for any reason? What if you didn’t blame yourself for being so sensitive, but cherished how naturally open you are to receiving the gift of life, no matter how daunting or delicious any moment seems?
Even when you are unable to love, simply resting in the blessing of “May this moment help me learn to love as never before” inspires milestones of growth that uplift your experience, while energetically assisting in the transformation of others. On behalf of the Universe, when the world seems cruel, we become more caring. When witnessing the unthinkable, we respond with greater thoughtfulness. When the world denies its pain, we dare to turn towards it. When life appears to be at its darkest hour, we shine our lights to brighten each perspective. This is the way of the new spiritual paradigm.
All For Love,
Matt Kahn

Pink Beaches in Utah

As I stood on the bank of the large lake just 35 minutes from my house; I gazed out at the pristine waters that spread from east to west. The barren brown mountain to the north was a stark contrast to the bluish Oquirrh mountains beyond the sparkling water.

I walked toward the water, expecting to feel squishy sand on the beach. Instead, I felt the hardened salt crystals stand their ground under the weight of my sandals. The only sound to be heard was the crunching of the salty “ice” under our feet.

The breeze was salty too, as if to not be left out. The crisp fall air that I had distinctly felt the last few days was noticeably gone- likely retreating back to its summer hibernation and graciously allowing the hot summer sun to have one more day of service.

My husband and I were on the shores of the Great Salt Lake, the largest natural lake west of the Mississippi River and the largest salt water lake in the western hemisphere- according to visitSaltLake.com.

The pink water on this particular side, are due to the millions of brine shrimp which are {tiny} aquatic creatures called brine shrimp, they eat algae instead of grass, and there are about 17 trillion of them”.

Atlas Obscura
"The brine shrimp are grazing crustaceans, surviving on a diet of algae that grows in Utah’s Great Salt Lake. They reproduce by laying hardy eggs called cysts, which survive over the winter and hatch each spring to restart the population. Brine shrimp cysts have been harvested there for decades—it’s a $67 million-a-year industry that supplies food for fish farms around the world—and since 1992...."-Atlas Obscura
Photo Credit

The brine shrimp bring back a fond memory from my childhood. Remember the sea monkeys ads?

Our pink shrimp adventure was one of many weekend jaunts we took in the beautiful mountains and deserts surrounding our city and state. But this one was different.

This time, I didn’t have to force myself to not think of my son.

I didn’t have to wonder if he survived the night. I didn’t have to wonder if he was in Vegas getting shot at.

I didn’t have to wonder if this mountain, or desert, or landmark would be the one where they call me to tell me my son passed away.

Although no days are promised to any of us, this time, I knew my son was relatively safe.

This time, after a series of miracles, my son was inside a rehab, (hopefully) starting his final journey of recovery.

It’s been almost 2 years since he entered his first and only rehab. He went out of state after a family intervention, just like you see on TV. He did ok there, despite it being a bit scammy. He made it 72 days clean.

The last 2 years have left me and those close to him, swimming in darkness as we struggled to understand the terrifying grip this disease has on him. But just like the brine shrimp above-their brine eggs remain viable in dry conditions for several years- because of desiccation tolerance; my son was being preserved in his “drought”.

"Desiccation tolerance refers to the ability of an organism to withstand or endure extreme dryness, or drought-like conditions. This means that physiological or behavioral adaptations to withstand these periods are necessary to ensure survival". source

Oh how my heart would weep at what conditions my sons life was in, at his little kids’ left behind and in the real possibilities of harm or loss of his freedom that awaited. I would weep in joy at others’s successes, then turn to sorrow that my son & our family was still struggling.

Little did I know that like the brine shrimp eggs in drought, or in their normal cold winter; those seeds of hope and love were being nourished in my son in the form of faith that he could pull through his “drought” period.

Yesterday, after not seeing my beautiful boy for 16 months-my husband and I embarked on another adventure- a midnight trek- driving 800 miles that ended in the sheer joy of watching my son walk willingly into a rehab and say: Thank you.

I know that nothing is promised. Many would say that this doesn’t mean anything. Addicts go through rehabs like Cars in McDonald’s drive-through. But my son is very rehab-resistant (for that very reason) and his rock bottom is as deep as the sea. He acclimates to every new level of condition that this life style has thrown at him. So to see the willingness of him to go through the door of the rehab, makes this mama’s heart soar.

May we all find joy in the present. In the beauty of now. Whatever droughts we have been through to whatever the future holds; may we offer Seeds of Hope and Love to all those around us.

I hope you enjoy my pictures.

Going To Rehab While On Parole

ByNova Recovery Center – with home I have no affiliation with. |Posted on July 3, 2019

inmate in a cell

The legal consequences of drug abuse can vary greatly, but most often, drug offenders are sentenced with hefty fines, probation, or are sent to jail immediately, especially if they have a history of prior arrests. However, going to rehab while on probation can be extremely beneficial, and for individuals on parole, it may even be necessary.

Even under the best conditions and circumstances, starting over after spending time in jail can be difficult. Many people on parole may have difficulties finding employment due to a lack of education, skills, or criminal history. Others may have mental and/or physical health problems that interfere with their ability to reintegrate into society after being in prison. And many individuals who get out of prison are also struggling with drug and alcohol addiction, with little to no recovery support.

Adjusting to adjust to life outside of jail while attempting to live a crime-free and drug-free life is a complex process that requires ongoing support and rehabilitation. A drug and alcohol rehab program can offer a wealth of benefits for people who are on probation, parole, or who are trying to turn over a new leaf after being released from prison.

While many drug offenders are incarcerated following a DUI, DWI, or other drug-related crime, it’s not impossible to get a fresh start after being released from jail. If you’ve been released from prison on parole or you’ve been sentenced to probation and you’re looking for a drug rehab program that will help you begin your new sober life, here’s what you need to know.

Probation and Parole for DUI, DWI, and Other Drug-Related Crimes

Substance abuse and crime are known to be interconnected, with many criminal offenses stemming from addictive behaviors. Although addiction is recognized as a chronic disease that affects behavior and impulse control, many criminal offenders who commit drug-related crimes serve lengthy prison sentences and get out of jail only to pick up where they left off and end up back in jail. In fact, research shows half of all jail inmates are reincarcerated within three years of being released.1

The challenges of adjusting to life outside of jail and maintaining a drug-free lifestyle can be overwhelming for many people who are on parole or who served a full sentence and were recently released from prison. However, there are alternatives to incarceration for drug offenders, one of which is drug court.

People who commit drug-related crimes often end up in drug court, where they are given the opportunity to enter a long-term addiction treatment program instead of going to jail.2 Court-ordered rehab gives them the chance to address the underlying issue (substance abuse) and learn how to live a fulfilling, crime-free life while providing much-needed support.

For criminal offenders who are on parole following an early release from jail, drug rehab may seem like a violation of parole conditions, but enrollment in rehab is often encouraged in the event of a relapse or recurrence of symptoms and can help drug offenders prioritize their recovery while they adjust to life on the outside.

What Are the Benefits of Parole Rehabilitation Programs for Addiction?

The purpose of parole is to help prison inmates re-enter society successfully and avoid becoming a re-offender. This is a great option for inmates who are motivated to change after being released from prison. Additionally, it’s also great for taxpayers, as parole in Texas costs $4 per day per offender and incarceration costs $50.3

Although parole supervision at the end of a prison term reduces the likelihood of future arrest, the Urban Institute study found that drug offenders do not typically benefit from parole supervision.3 In these cases, an addiction treatment program is much more likely to provide the support drug offenders need to maintain their sobriety and successfully reintegrate back into society.

Just a few of the primary benefits of drug rehab for people on parole include:

  • A focus on relapse prevention and management
  • Life skills development
  • Opportunities to engage in healthy relationships with sober people
  • Active engagement in a recovery program
  • Access to safe and sober housing
  • Trauma-informed therapy for self-esteem and identity issues
  • Employment and volunteer assistance4

Not only are there many great benefits of attending rehab while on parole, but coming clean and enrolling in a drug rehab program can also show your parole officer and the judge that you’re serious about changing your life and that you’re willing to put in the hard work to get it done.Talk to a Treatment Expert – (512) 520-0255FREE INSURANCE VERIFICATION & CONSULTATIONName *FirstLastEmail *Phone *Your Messagehttps://newassets.hcaptcha.com/captcha/v1/b1129b9/static/hcaptcha-checkbox.html#id=0cf2r1jb9o0g&host=novarecoverycenter.com&sentry=true&reportapi=https%3A%2F%2Faccounts.hcaptcha.com&recaptchacompat=true&custom=false&tplinks=on&sitekey=fa544d83-6542-40db-96cb-624850045369&theme=lightGet Help!

Can I Go to Rehab While on Probation?

Yes. Going to rehab on probation is often highly encouraged by judges and other law enforcement professionals who work in probation and parole departments. In recent years, the legal system has begun to change the handling of drug-related criminal arrests and sentencing. As such, court-ordered drug rehab is now much more common than it used to be. This is great news for addicted individuals who would prefer to be sent to an addiction treatment center rather than jail.

However, if you are on probation and you want to go to rehab, you should maintain ongoing communication with your probation officer and keep the limitations of your probation in mind, as any violation could have serious consequences such as immediate arrest or jail time.

For example, if you violate the terms of your probation and use drugs or bring them with you to the rehab center, the staff will be required to report this to your probation officer and you will immediately be sent to jail.

Before you commit to rehab while on probation, you should speak with your probation officer first to get permission. Most often, the probation officer and a judge will need to sign a few documents that you will need to take with you to the addiction treatment center. This is especially true if the facility is located outside of the state where you have been sentenced to probation.

What to Expect From a Rehab Program While on Probation or Parole

If you’re on parole and you’re suffering from addiction, communicating honestly with your parole officer about going to rehab may be the best choice. Going to rehab after prison may not be your idea of “freedom,” but it will provide you with the tools you need to prevent relapse and avoid going back to jail for violating the conditions of your parole.

Many people who enroll in rehab while they are on parole, but it’s completely understandable if you don’t know where or how to start looking for help. Once you communicate with your parole officer about your substance abuse problems, he or she may be able to refer you to a drug therapist or rehab program.

Depending on your circumstances and your treatment needs, there are several different types of rehab options that may cater to your individual situation, including:

Regardless of what type of drug rehab program you participate in or which rehab center you choose, you will still need to abide by the conditions of your parole while you are enrolled in rehab. This means you’ll need to report to your parole officer regularly, not break the law, and agree to law enforcement searches of your vehicle, home, and personal possessions, among other common conditions of parole.5

While you are in treatment, your counselors and/or therapists may also communicate with your parole officer to provide updates on your treatment progress. The rehab center may also send the results of all your drug tests to your parole officer as evidence of your ongoing sobriety.

Although there will likely be some behind-the-scenes work that makes it possible for you to attend detox, rehab, or sober living while on parole, this shouldn’t affect your treatment experience negatively.

Intensive Outpatient Programs (IOP) on Parole or Probation

IOP (intensive outpatient program) is a type of outpatient drug rehab program that provides structured group treatment sessions and evidence-based therapies to help individuals maintain their sobriety and adjust to sober life outside of an inpatient setting. IOP offers a high level of support and structure to decrease the likelihood of relapse, boost self-confidence in sobriety, and address physical or psychological issues in recovery.

At Nova Recovery Center, IOP is a robust treatment program that consists of three group sessions per week for a total of eight weeks. Treatment sessions primarily focus is on life skills, relapse prevention, and peer support, with group discussions covering a variety of topics, including:

  • Social skills
  • Restructuring thoughts
  • Family dynamics
  • The science of addiction
  • Problem-solving

Intensive outpatient programs are an excellent treatment option for people on parole, as they provide comprehensive treatment with the flexibility to continue working, going to school, or maintaining other personal responsibilities and commitments.

Going to Rehab After Prison: The Start of a New Beginning

Going to rehab after prison or while you’re on parole is an excellent opportunity to start fresh and change your life. In rehab, you’ll gain the tools and life skills necessary to establish and maintain a healthy, sober lifestyle in recovery and hopefully, never see the inside of a jail cell again.

The Magazine Rack

Over the last decade or so, we’ve heard all the things the smartphone has replaced.

  • Calculator
  • Camera
  • Rolodex
  • Pager
  • Mp3 player
  • Boom box
  • Computer
  • Typewriter

But what you never hear about is the bathroom magazine holder. For as long as I’ve “played house” which is about 38 years now; I’ve had a basket 🧺 of ‘reading material’ by each toilet.

I can almost say with complete certainty that in the last 10 years, not one book or magazine has been pulled out and looked at except by me to clean the greasy dust of them.

So why do we hold onto completely useless things? Because of tradition? Or habit. I heard an organizer on the l radio say that you don’t need a pile of washcloths in your bathroom by the shower if you never use one.

That was HUGE for me!

I tend to keep things- just in case someone needs them.

Although I rarely have house guests, there’s always that ‘chance’.

As I looked around at what my attempt of ‘just in case’ was costing me, I noticed the endless half (or less) empty shampoo bottles that I keep because I don’t want to “waste the money”, yet I’ve outgrown the desire to use that brand.

How much is your time/space/clarity/simplification/order/dust-free items/TIME? Worth?

Amazon has it all figured out in this article. But im more interested in what psychological effect the clutter of these items has on a day-to-day basis. Every single thing in our houses has to be

*Looked at*

*Cleaned*

*Moved*

*Stored*

And before all these things- the mental energy has to be conjured up to do each one. This may not seem like a big deal to some, but we really do only have so much mental energy and time. If there is one stressful thing sucking up that time and energy, it pulls it in even tighter.

I guess you could call it Fall cleaning instead of spring cleaning. Practical Perfection has a great fall cleaning checklist.

THE ULTIMATE FALL CLEANING CHECKLIST 

So today is purge day. I got rid of my toilet 🧺 basket! Now I’m working on unused washcloths.